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  • Danielle Fanfair

Going to LA: Ball Out or Curl Up?


Here was my dilemma: after years of hard work, we are finally able to take a vacation. I have family in Los Angeles, and through a web of work opportunities, blessings and divine discounts, we're heading to sunny California for a rejuvenating stint. Ah, but what to do when I get out there?

Here are my options:

  1. Take it slow and easy. Rest, write, meander through the streets and along the shores of the City of Angels. Do the things I always said I wanted to do when I fly in for a limited amount of days.

  2. Go everywhere looking snatched, posting on the ‘gram scored by Drake's “Nice For What.“ Pass out cards. Meet new clients. Drop it like it's hot. Repeat.

Decisions, decisions.

It was during a 4-day Harmony Triads training called Motions of the Soul that Clare Loughridge taught me a tool that cleared up my confusion. The best choice for me came into sharp focus out of the haze of several different ways to spend my time there. I can now sense the difference between a good option and the best choice for me.

The Harmony Triads have their name because they provide a sense of balance. As a gift, you can download my free e-book called, "Deepening Discernment". The book explores the three intelligence centers, that is the three centers through which humans perceive information. We understand the world through our:

  • Head (our thinking or intellectual intelligence)

  • Heart (our feeling or emotional intelligence)

  • Gut (our instinctual intelligence)

Most of us rely on one of those intelligence centers and don't intentionally develop the others. You ever hear someone say, "She wears her heart on her sleeve?" What about "He is too in his head?" Oh, and, "He just acts without thinking?"

These clichés refer to the tendency to overuse one intelligence without bringing in the other two. These centers are where our discernment and understanding exist; we can more deeply know good by investigating with our other centers.

The Harmony Triads give each personality type a way to sense into their head, heart, and gut when making choices. Each type is connected to two other types, making a triangle that comprises a head type, a heart type, and a gut type. Choosing between two right decisions, or whether or not to do something becomes much more evident when we filter the choices through our heads, hearts, and gut, rather than just relying upon one.

Look at the image (used with permission):

See how the symbol is a stack of equilateral triangles? These triangles represent the head/heart/gut connection each type has to one another. For a quick list describing  the types, click here.

So, my Harmony Triad consists of my dominant Type 1 (a gut type), Type 4 (a heart type) and Type 7 (a head type).

Starting at my Type 1, I assessed my gut. I brought attention to my belly center, and asked what my body needed. “Rest,” I breathed out. A chance to stop doing and going at the same pace. I felt like air was leaking from me every day.

Then I went to my Type 4’s heart. Type Fours are in tune with their emotions and very self-aware. Leaning into that awareness, I understood that I’ve made a practice of repressing my emotions. So I need to give myself space to emote; to be happy and content without fearing that something bad would happen, and to allow pain, sadness and anger to come and then go instead of holding onto it.

Moving over to my head center, Type 7, my mind began to race with plans for fun and new experiences. When on vacation, my husband asks, “Who ARE you?” I’m more laid-back, my clothes are brighter (and shorter) and my sense of adventure is on 10. My immediate thought was, “You need to re-wire your brain to work from joy and not anger.”

My practice of moving through my head, heart and gut helped me to understand what I needed most, for my sanity and health.

Sooo…drumroll, please….

My decision: my time in California is a sabbatical. It's a time to retreat, rest, and do my absolute favorite things: read, write and be fully present with my family for the first time in years.

Sorry, Bey and Jay. I have to link up with Y'all next trip.

I cannot wait to teach my clients how to use the Harmony Triads to get clear about the next significant choice they have to make.

A Few Exploration Questions For You:

-What big questions or opportunities are you weighing right now?

-How can you access your head, heart and gut to bring harmony as you discern what is the best choice for you today?

-If you would like my help exploring the season you are in, click here.


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